He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. Ecc. 3:11
At the beginning of 2019, God put this verse before me. After 2 very difficult years, it felt like a promise; a new year had come, and finally a breath of fresh year. Three hundred and sixty-five days later, I am sitting here marveling at all He has done. However, today the end of the verse is really what sticks out to me. I look back and see so many ways that God has been faithful and that He has blessed me. Yet, I still do not understand why He allowed the 2 prior years to be so difficult. I am going into 2020, but I do not know what He is going to do. Although I long to understand everything in my life, God has limited my ability to do so. And I am so thankful. If I knew the suffering that awaited me, I wouldn’t move forward. If I knew the blessings that were coming, I wouldn’t stand in awe of the one who orchestrated them for me.
You see, our longing to know and to control everything in our life isn’t from God. That is why the Bible repeatedly tells us to “wait” and “fear not.” Yes, God will make everything beautiful in its time, but that means that there will be times when it isn’t all beautiful. There will be times when there is more pain than joy, more tears than smiles, more frustration than peace, even so there lays the promise. You won’t know, you won’t understand, but He does. His plan is in progress, and in due time you will see the beautiful. So, hold on! Fear not! God is good. He is fighting for you. Enter 2020 with an open heart and open hands. My life is out of my control, but I can rest peacefully knowing the one who is in control.